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What do you remember about your family vacations as a kid?
I remember my dad driving late into the night because he refused to pay more than $50 for a hotel room and we simply weren’t in a $50 per night part of the world. He would get off at each exit and my mom would go in and ask the price for a night for a family of six. Then she’d hop back in the car – a little more frazzled each time. I remember that we ended up in a poolside room, which we thought was the coolest thing ever, even though the water was a little green and someone had a boom box blasting that kept us up well past bedtime.
I remember being over-the-moon excited about “free stuff” at every visitor’s center, hotel, and museum. It became a family joke. We couldn’t cross a state line without stopping at the welcome center because Jenn had to run in for her free stuff.
I remember my mom reading to us in the car. I remember both fighting and laughing with my sisters in the back seat. I remember the awful burn of vinyl seats and metal seatbelts. I remember my mom waking up before dawn every morning to get ready for the fun-packed days she had scheduled and rustling plastic bags that she insisted on using for packing. That’s how we woke up on every morning of every family vacation – to the sound of grocery bags crinkling obnoxiously.
I can’t tell you where we were. I don’t remember. I mean, I can’t even list off states visited as a child because I have absolutely no idea.
What sticks is both the togetherness and the differentness. We abandoned home and routine for an adventure together. We connected over new experiences lived together. In fact, my sisters and I all still cringe at the sound of plastic grocery bags.
Accessible memories
Planning an accessible vacation can feel so daunting and our itineraries have to be so carefully mapped that it can feel like we’re too on edge to be present with the family we’ve worked so hard to curate these memories for.
First of all, that doesn’t mean you’re not making memories. My kids have fantastic memories from even the most overwhelming trips… sometimes of the most obscure moments.
Secondly, your itinerary doesn’t have to be perfectly planned for perfect memories – even when you’re traveling with a wheelchair.
What I’ve found makes the greatest difference is my own attitude. If I approach each day with an attitude of confidence and a spirit of adventure, my kids are all in.
We can’t use this subway station? Cool! Let’s try a city bus!
The museum elevator is out of service and all of the cool stuff is upstairs? Looks like a great day for ice cream for breakfast!
The restaurant we all had our hearts set on for dinner has stairs to get in? Seems like a good time to connect with the locals and ask for some help.
There is some level of comedy in how often we strike out, if I’m willing to step back and see the irony. Otherwise, our travels have the potential to be never-ending stress. The kids trust me implicitly and will happily follow me on any adventure – regardless of how many times that adventure shifts directions.
We’ve had hikes that ended with us single file on a major highway. We’ve had Christmas Eve dinner at a gas station. We’ve had picnics of air sandwiches with the most incredible views.
Moments of joy in chaos
Here are some examples of things my kids highlight as their favorite travel memories.
Eating at the “mother of all SHEETZ”
That’s right – it’s a gas station. They were allowed to order deep fried foods and there were no veggies involved. It was an absolute win for them.
Watching a play in Grand Rapids
We could go to the theatre at home, but we don’t. It was a unique experience and they’re still quoting lines over a year later.
Happy Cafe
This little sandwich shop in Paris may not be the food you dream of with a trip to France, but we were tired and hungry and the owner welcomed us in with such gusto that we had to stay. He interacted with each of the kids, making it feel like a visit to family more than eating in a restaurant. He played games with them and spoiled them with candy.
People
Happy Cafe isn’t the only time our interactions have trumped our experiences. They make friends at playgrounds and children’s museums almost everywhere we go. Another kid favorite was camp at the National Ability Center – not because of the adaptive activities, but because of the friends they made.
Animals
Memorable interactions don’t even have to be human. A travel highlight for my kids is petting dogs they meet along the way. A favorite memory is when we stayed in a house with chickens.
Getting a ball at a baseball game
They didn’t even catch it, which was their original hope. They had the nerve to ask the ball boy for an extra in between plays. It’s a most cherished souvenir and it was only a minor league game.
Just go
Absolutely plan ahead to find your accessible room and travel to a destination known for accessible attractions, but don’t stress about a lack of accessibility ruining your trip. The chances are high that you’ll have something planned that you’re not able to do. Take a detour. Do something else. Have an Uno tournament in your hotel room. The point is that you’re doing something new together – and that will be true no matter how you redirect. Just don’t be surprised when you get home and find out your child’s favorite part was the turnpike toll booth.